For all of my professional life, I tried to help people who are serious about developing their writing skills. That’s why I taught writing courses at Emory University, and was invited to teach at writer’s workshops and conferences around the Country. However, that is very different from being taken advantage of by those on an ego trip.
When people go to a doctor, they wouldn’t dare say, “Doc, please rip out my tonsils for free.” Hey, attorneys even charge for a phone call when dispensing knowledgeable advice over the line. These folks are recognized professionals, and people expect to pay them for their expertise. But, somehow, writers don’t get the same respect.
The difference between a professional writer and a wanna-be writer is money. Professionals work with contracts and get paid for their work. If it’s a published book or a produced play, there are advance payments and royalties paid to the writer by the publisher or producer---whereas---wanna-bees pay someone else to create their product.
“I think I can write like James Patterson” might not ring true, since he is so successful and rich because he knows how to develop a plot, introduce interesting characters and write so skillfully that he can keep readers absorbed in his books. Patterson’s 300 million books have been edited, promoted and sold by reputable publishers, and no one has to pay reviewers to read them.
Recently, I have been inundated with requests to work for free. One young woman e-mailed me and asked me to write a 15-minute speech for her. She’s a nice but clueless person, and it probably would have aged her considerably, had I had billed her the fee that I was paid the last time I did a ghostwritten speech.
That same day, I received two unsolicited self-published novels from relative strangers. Unfortunately, they wanted my favorable opinion. What can I say about a 500-page wanna-be novel that has 7 plots in the first chapter? I gave it to a speed-reading friend, who finished the book and said, “What the Hell was that all about?” I guess something bad happened to the hero of the book in the first chapter, but the author forgot to tell us the why, when, where and how of that event in the other six plots. He also forgot to explain why the hero was so upset in the first place.
The second self-published work was from a nice, but misguided, man who thought he could write a romance novel. The sex scenes were obviously wishful thinking and hilarious. Laughter isn’t all that appreciated by the author when the writing isn’t supposed to be funny. It was a bit distracting that the author confused a “boudoir” and a “bouffant.” At first I thought it was a typographical error that, “She was afraid that someone would find him in her bouffant.” But after that, there were all kinds of hairy activities taking place in that “bouffant”. Both books require gasoline and a match!
If your family tells you they like your book, they may be lying. Remember, they have nothing to lose. However, if you send your book to me, and I say to you, “Wow! That is really something!”---It probably is!
F. Scott Fitzgerald said, “You can stroke people with words.” I don’t think he meant that your words should give someone a stroke.”
Esther Blumenfeld