Ding-a-lings

I never know whom I’m going to meet when I answer my telephone.  

Yesterday, when I answered the phone, the voice on the other end said,“I’m just calling to let you know that the plumber is going to be late.” 

“Well, shame on him,” I replied.“But why are you calling me?”

“Isn’t he supposed to come to your house?”she asked.

“Not as far as I know,” I replied. 

When I asked her what number she had dialed, we discovered she had missed it by just one flip of a finger.

Somehow, I seem to get an inordinate amount of misdialed calls. One woman told me,“You are the nicest wrong number I have ever talked to.”

On another occasion my phone number was mistakenly placed into an advertisement for an establishment catering to gay men. As soon as I answered the phone, the callers recognized that they had a wrong number. After I finally figured out what had happened, I contacted the newspaper so they could correct the mistake. At that time, I also obtained the correct number of the gay establishment. A week later, the owner called to thank me for all the referrals.

Mistakes can happen, but how much is one person expected to take?

A woman called and said, “My doctor gave me this number. I want to talk to your husband the urologist.” I told her, “My husband is not a urologist.  My husband is a psychologist.” “No,” she said, “You are wrong. My doctor gave me this number and I want to talk to the urologist.”  

“Lady,” I said, “My husband is not a urologist. My husband can’t even fix a leaking faucet.” She hung up on me!

Got to go. The phone is ringing. I wonder if it’s the plumber.

Esther Blumenfeld (there’s static on the line)