DIDN'T EXPECT THAT

At 10 p.m. last night I had an unexpected visitor. A big, black cricket on steroids was hopping across my living room rug. Planning to trap it, I spent the next 10 minutes trying to catch that sucker with a drinking glass and a piece of cardboard to slip underneath, but every time I got close, that cricket jumped away from me, and finally disappeared behind a bookcase. At that, I gave up and figured that if I went into the bedroom and closed the door, the Olympic Sprinter would stay in the living room, and I could catch him in the morning.

However, when I entered the bedroom—SURPRISE! That cricket chirped Ha! Ha! as it hopped around my bed. No more Mr. Nice Guy! I grabbed a wad of toilet paper, grabbed the critter and threw it into the toilet—flushing twice just in case he was the Mark Spitz of crickets.

Blame it on climate change, because here in Tucson, Arizona we have an unexpected season of flooding Monsoon rains which have also been a boon for insects.  The Mesquite Moths, ready to lay their larva, have found their way onto our balconies and into our hallways. It just so happens that there is a display of home knitted sweaters in one hall which I suspect will become a moth smorgasbord soon.

The thing is that everyday all of us live with the unexpected. I think it’s called the curve ball of life. Sometimes it’s very good and sometimes not so good and most times you don’t see it coming such as when I was a teenager hosting a slumber party at my home.

The girls arrived before my parents returned from a meeting. Since I didn’t have enough places for all of my friends to sleep, we decided to remove the mattress from my parents’ bed. I thought they’d never really notice since there was an innerspring mattress underneath. I re-made the bed, and we all got snacks from the kitchen and returned to my room. Later that night, we heard a loud bang from my parents’ bedroom when they hit the innerspring. They handled it well. They didn’t kill me. You cannot plan for the unexpected, but it says a lot about you as to how you handle it.

When I was a journalist, I was assigned a downtown interview in Atlanta, Georgia. When going downtown I always wore sneakers on the  commuter train, and once I arrived at the building, where my interview was to take place, I’d always go to the Lady’s Room and change from sneakers to the more acceptable high heeled shoes.

As it so happened this was an attractive glass building with a very fancy Lady’s Loo. I was amazed at the elegant furniture that had been tastefully placed within. I sat in a comfortable leather chair and bent down to change my shoes when I heard one of the stall doors open, and water running in the sink. Then I heard a clink in the crystal dish on the table next to me. I looked up as a woman left the room and saw a used linen towel on the table. She had left me a 25 cent tip. I was offended. She didn’t even say “Thank You!”

I have learned a few things about the unexpected such as all of a sudden I am old. When did that happen? Where did the little girl go? Well, I am the same person—only the facade has changed—A LOT! All I can do is to hope that my next unexpected will be a good one—-and if not—- to meet it as best I can.  But at least next time with a fly swatter!

Esther Blumenfeld